An Oscar-sized Ego

NOTE: This is a hot mess, I’ll be coming back at the end of the night to fix spelling errors, vague notes, etc.

I’m not so conceited as to think you all want to see my Oscar-thoughts all over facebook… but I’m still important, ya know. So I’ve set up camp here on the couch – seltzer, coffee, chocolate, yarn, dog – and I’ll be sharing my thoughts throughout the evening.

I’m no Ben Deutsh, but I do love my movies… However this year has been a rather poor year for me! I’ve been, well, happy. Busy. I’ve spent just a little less time in theaters, and the time that I *did* spend was about half comedies and half Harry Potter and Tron (yeah, saw each of those multiple times. Four times for Tron I think…) so for the first time in ages, I don’t really have many opinions about the nominees, I’m just happy to sit back and enjoy it. I actually have intentionally stayed away from all mentions of the current nominees (other than the BP’s) so I’ll be nice and surprised as they’re all announced hah.

I skipped all of the pre-show muck – not really intentionally, I just got wrapped up in watching some stuff on Netflix.

Love the stage! I feel like its a little smaller than other years, but I like that. No giant golden oscars all over a complex and motorized futuristic set… just the semi-circle “frames” and center screen give a really nice (outdoor amphitheater thing?) feel to it. And I really really love the sparkles coming from the “podium” circle.

I have Morgan Freeman narrate my dreams, too, by the way. What? He has a nice voice!

Art direction – would’ve been cool if one of the BP nominees won it, for that whole trifecta thing, but Alice was absolutely and devastatingly beautiful. Would’ve been cool with HP getting it, though, those are just stunning movies through and through.

I haven’t even seen True Grit, but I’m really hoping Hailee Steinfeld gets it… I love seeing young actors take home supporting awards. Oh, but it’s Melissa Leo… I haven’t seen her movie, but I love her acceptance speech! Nothing gets me like pure and genuine gratitude.

Love watching Kirk Douglas wander around the stage… so cute. He managed to veer deftly around creepy old man and land firmly on sweet lovely Hollywood

Timberlake is Banksy? I’d buy it. (There’s an app for that.)

I haven’t even HEARD of any of the animated shorts, but was there any doubt about Toy Story taking home animated feature? I think not. That’s on my short list of need-to-see movies.

Ok, that fancy feast commercial? Ridiculous. But my cats are both totally jealous of that room.

I don’t really get how Toy Story is an adapted screenplay – they said “based on the previous films”. Wouldn’t that imply that every sequel is adapted?

I’m pitifully behind – I don’t think I’ve seen MOST of the BP noms, so sad. But yay to TNS for the win!

I think they start playing the music earlier for the folks who just start listing names… folks with a heartwarming and interesting speech get more time.

Also need to see: Kings Speech.

Damn, Hathaway can sing! And, James Franco really has the shoulders to pull off a strapless dress!

I don’t think I’ve *ever* seen any of the foreign films. Was that guy about to cut a kitten with hedge clippers?? Well… go Denmark!

Supporting Actor – Everytime someone says Winter’s Bone, I hear Wayne and Garth in my head. Winter’s Booooone! I’d love to see Mark Rufalo or Geofrey Rush win, mostly cause I just like those guys, but I think Rush really deserves it. Hm, a win for Bale – this is his first?? Interesting. Glad he got it.

I’m really loving all of the little jabs back and forth between Hathaway and Jackman.

I have to say, perhaps I’m biassed since, as you may note, I saw Tron 4 times, but I was really bummed about the absolute lack of nominations for them, especially in the music category. Would have loved to see how Daft Punk would deal with an Oscar win… Wow, that’s what Trent Reznor looks like now? Alright, go Social Network!

Franco, why the six degrees joke? That kinda fell flat…

Ok, go Inception! Sound Mixing, sure, I’d buy that. But I really wish Tron got Sound Editing.

Also, shut up Celine.

Note: Franco is also running lights and conducting the orchestra tonight.

I REALLY wish they should have shown more of the Techies. A quick pan over 11 innovators… not really enough for me. Tomei, wtf, show me more.

Cate Blanchet’s intro reminded me that it’s time to rewatch the LOTR movies. You’re right, Ms. Blanchet, it WAS visually stunning and transported you to a whole new world. Like your dress… whaaaat…

Didn’t see wolfman either, but just based on the ads I think they deserve a make-up win. Though I do wish they’d stop showing the transformation clip – not only is it gross, but that’s CG… c’mon. But yes, winning an oscar alongside Rick Baker is always better than losing one to him πŸ™‚

Atwood – I remember her! She’s costumed some of my favorite movies!! Wasn’t there a year she was nominated twice? (Ok, she won for Chicago and Geisha, that’s why I know the name… and its her 9th nom! Amazing!) Based on the costumes alone, I must see the Tempest… Ok well, another visual-based award for Alice! Love it!

Obama’s pick? As Time Goes By. A classy guy. Followed by Spacey, more class! Silly Spacey, you’re not Clooney… but you’d make a good Astaire! (Biopic anyone?)

Randy Newman, 20 nominations, damn. Left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot… I won’t say I loved Tangled, but I enjoyed it. It fit the cartoon movie format perfectly, and this song certainly doesnt deviate from that formula.

I think Amy Adams is just beautiful… but she falls a little short of the mark tonight. Oscars, in my opinion, are all about Old Hollywood Glamour. The dress nailed it, but the necklace was wrong and the hair was… Emmys.

I wonder what Poster Girl is like… looks cool…

Strangers No More, doc short, looks neat. I think once I’m living in a big city, I’ll start going to those things where they show all of the oscar short noms in a theater…

Live Action Short – the crush, god of love, look really sweet… wish 143 is a tear jerker I’m sure. love takes it! No haircut, buddy, you look awesome Luke Matheny! His mom did craft services and his lady was his composer, that’s cinema-love πŸ˜€

Anne’s current dress, I kinda love it… with the danglys and all… and I love the sexy tousled hair with it.

Autotuned musicals… OMG. Tiny Ball of Light!! And I think Timberlake’s got a new single here. Get NERD to remix it and you’re set. He Doesn’t Own A Shirt, and Woody is jealous.

Oprah, I’m not a fan, but can I have the lower half of that dress please?

If things are lousy and we feel bad, we go to the movies… hell yes. Movies have gotten me through so damn much. Thanks for acknowledging that, Lady O.

And she shakes her dress! Yesss!

Documentary Features: Exit Through The Giftshop! Gasland! Inside Job! Restrepo! Waste Land! I’ve actually HEARD of all of these! And two of them are on my Netflix que! Kinda really bummed that Giftshop didn’t win, if only because I want to see how Banksy would’ve handled it…

Way to get in a little political statement, Charles whoever you are. (Inside Job)

Billy Crystal takes the stage! He’s here to show us a look at the first televised oscars, 1953, Bob Hope. 18 for bob, 8 for billy, really not bad. You’re both Really Sexy Movie Stars in my book πŸ˜‰ Did Bob Hope REALLY flip off Billy Crystal when he was hosting? I kinda love that. Now lets see how Bob did it… Holographic Hope, weird!! Let it be me, but if it can’t be me, not him… (Hollywood Passover, dig it.)

RDJ and Jude Law were introduced by Bob Hope – jealous! Love the Holmes audio clip. They’re wearing rather complimentary suits, I like it! Way to refer to your Attention to Detail in 2000 RDJ πŸ˜‰

I would love to see HP get Visual Effects, but I have a feeling Inception will land it, it was just beautiful. It’d be cool to see Iron Man win with RDJ on stage… Inception gets it! A well-deserved win.

Editing – Black Swan, hrm, it could take this one… but Social Network takes another!

Holy crap, Anne’s Red Dress. And further elegant-but-tousled hair… I’m in love.

How to train your dragon, that’s disgusting. (Thanks James πŸ™‚ )

Jennifer Hudson, I liked you better when you wore double didgits…

Florence continues the orange trend. I love me some orange. And, with one minor tweak, I’d love the hell out of that dress of hers.

Gwenyth’s mic looks like it was dipped in white-out. And… singing “sensation” may be taking it a bit far. Let’s get Hathaway back to belt out another number!

I’m severely under-whelmed by all of the original songs this year. May as well give it to Randy Newman, there isn’t really a better choice…

Commercial break! Quick, time to get in pajamas and grab a beer!

Oh no, it’s the In Memoriam montage… I will, of course, tear up a bit. Pardon me while I hit mute… OMG I forgot Pete Postlewaithe! Wow, Susannah York was beautiful. Um, who is she? Goodbye Kershner. Wait, DENIS HOPPER DIED?? Ah Blake Edwards… Halle Berry with a tribute to Lena Horne. I really need to learn how to do my hair like Horne’s in that Stormy Weather clip.

Copy/pasted this from Ben, cause it’s just so good: “UPDATE: Twitter reminds me that Corey Haim was overlooked in the In Memoriam segment! Burn! Also, I wonder if they had a Charlie Sheen photo ready, just in case…?”

Swank introduces Bigelow who introduces directors, ok. Hm, the King’s Speech, really? Guess I really ought to see that film… And the moral of Hooper’s story is, listen to your mother. Sweet.

Further agreement with Ben – Hathaway does far better when she’s out there on her own. While I *LOVE* Franco in so many things he does, he’s kind of flat on the Oscar stage.

Benning (she looked so cute arriving with Beaty by the way) for Governor’s awards recap – yay Lifetime Achievements! Eli Welch stole my heart in The Holiday. I was kind of hoping that Jack Black’s theme music would play for him as he took the stage… Lucas talking about Coppola, weird!

I’m not really feeling Anne’s blue dress, but I’m rather impressed with whoever straightened her hair in the last half hour. Nicely done!

And Jeff Bridges takes the award for most commercial voiceovers – oh wait, he’s here to present Best Actress! Warren Beaty looks so proud of Annette, I love it. Bridges is giving touching little intros addressed to each actress, it’s cuuuute! Jennifer Lawrence, in Winter’s Boooooone! It’s the ugly-up-a-pretty-girl role heh. Portman is way preggers and way cute, but… meh. Michelle Williams looks like a totally different person! The hair and makeup combo just makes her *glow*!

Having only seen Black Swan out of ALL of these movies, I can’t really pick, but I don’t’ really think Portman should get it… oh well, it goes to Natalie! She’s charming and likable, so it’s all good.

Hathaway getting all flustered about Bullock, how sweet! I like the Chinese Theater gate, but, where’d Sandra leave the rest of her nose?

Ok Sandra is doing the same thing as Bridges, talking direcly to the noms, I kinda dig this concept. (And yes, Bardem’s hair in No Country was creepy. And no, I didn’t like that movie. At all. Deal with it.) Dude! Sandra tells Bridges to give someone else a chance, I love it! She addresses Eisenberg with a facebook reference, woah, didn’t see that one coming… (Sarcasm.) Now, making reference to the Queen approving of King’s Speech – I heard she had asked that this story not be told until she had passed? Franco is the reason why moms are late to pick up their kids… I’d buy that. I’d say Bridges, because even though I haven’t seen the movie I’m *damn* sure he deserves it, but we’ll see. And it goes to… Firth. Meh. He does his usual charming-but-befuddled-britt best. Somewhere, Hugh Grant is raising a glass.

This sparkly column turtleneck number will be Anne’s last dress of the night… I’m not sure if I love it, but it’s SPARKLY so it can’t be all bad. (After a few close-ups, I really do like it! But it could do without the boob-seams.)

Way to give a nod to the *shoulda won* best pic nods, Spielberg πŸ˜€

My pic? Social Network. Not because it’s the one I’d like to see win, but because I think it’s the most likely. My heart would love to see Toy Story 3 get it, but I think it’s between Inception, The King’s Speech and The Social Network… and my money’s on Social Network. This is a rather interesting monologue, backed by one of my favorite classical pieces (Beethoven’s Allegretto) but the overlying presence of, well, the king’s speech, makes me think I may have been wrong… and The King’s Speech takes it.

The kids chorus was cute, and Melissa Leo was ecstatic, a nice little note to end on.

My overall reaction to The Academy Awards this year? A huge resounding “meh”.

I mentioned several excuses such as happiness, lack of money, etc., but I think one of the biggest reasons behind my lack of movie awareness is the lack of *passion* about this year’s movies. I really could have made an effort to get to more movies, I could have found the time and the money, but I just wasn’t really feeling it. Oh well, I enjoyed the show!


About Alice

Massage therapist, knitter, baker, animal lover, reformed pack-rat, sometimes-dancer, car-singer, and so much more.
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5 Responses to An Oscar-sized Ego

  1. Anne(Mom) says:

    Loved your Oscar blog Al! I also found it to be rather “meh” but very, very pleasant. I loved your description of the Kirk Douglas segment. It’s amazing that the man is still even breathing, and he did NOT want to leave that stage, did he?!?
    Now, go to bed dear.

  2. dad says:

    very entertaining. i understood at least half of it. thanks.

  3. Ladies and gentlemen, my parents πŸ™‚

    Thanks for reading! I’m gonna clean this up while watching an episode of White Collar then, yes, I’m off to bed! (I’m actually typing this *in* bed, btw.)

  4. Ben says:

    Well done, Alice! (And thanks for the shout-outs!) For the record, I was also pissed that TRON got snubbed for Visual Effects and Score… makes zero sense. And yes, that guy WAS about to cut a kitten with hedge clippers in that foreign film — it’s called DOGTOOTH and it is excellent but INSANE. Lastly I also had Wayne & Garth’s “WINTER’S S BOOONNNE!” running thru my head all night, especially since Jennifer Lawrence cleans up so nice! All in all, a very “meh” show with mostly “meh” winners… thank goodness for our way-more-entertaining blogs. πŸ™‚

  5. Honestly, I think I wouldn’t have enjoyed it nearly as much without the blogging – both mine and yours!

    I think I’m gonna have to watch Dogtooth at some point… that tiny little clip was enough to intrigue me. And gross me out a little.

    Honestly, I think they should have rigged a win for Banksy just to spice up the awards a bit. Or at least seed a few more Banksy jokes in there… how often do you have an opportunity like *that* at the Oscars?

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